Ho, God!

"...you're sooooo good!!! So forgiving, so loving, so merciful, so...almighty! How could I have lived 18 years of my life without knowing you? Without knowing the magnitude of your amazing truths?! Lord God, I pray that through this blog you would bless the reader. That you would scoop up their life from under them and make it yours. I pray that this person would desire to know you intimately and grow to a point in there relationship with you where they can call you Dad. That they would familiarize with the same comfort, dependability and security provided by the people in their lives who love them and want to live according to your calling...whatever that may be. I pray that through my personal experiences and convictions and revelations by you, they would want to seek your kingdom for themselves and find it in there hearts to give praise :) For that, in itself, is the purpose for which you created us. Lord God, change our hearts. Make us new and impart on us your right ways. Forgive me for not loving so easy as I should. For not being so quick to listen and slow to speak. Lord God, I'm such a dirty person. Everyday I'm blown away everytime I think about your love for me...and how you sacrificed your holy, perfect son to wipe away my sins. Holy smokes!!! I sin choooke, God! Why?! How would you be so forgiving of the things I've done?! God, all I think about is myself! All I think about a lot of the time is how I will be used by you. How I can serve others to bring myself blessing! So selfish! Lord God, I pray that...NO MORE! I want my sights set on you and only! Never, ever do want to be dependent on anyone else for your glory. God, you no me so well....inside and out...and you know how lame I can be. How often I compare myself to other people...to weigh how much of a good person I am, how much better of a Christian I am, how fired-up spiritually I am, and how loving I am...

"Then you, my people, will know that I am Lord, when I open your graves and bring you up from them. I will put my Spirit in you and you will live, and I will settle you in your own land. Then you will know that I the Lord have spoken, and I have done it, declares the Lord" --> Ezekiel 37:13-14

God, Paul Washer says to "compare yourself to scripture. Not to men who call themselves Christian who compares to men who call themselves Christian." That's something that's stuck with me since I've heard it...and I don't want to be guilty of it anymore! Comparing myself to SCRIPTURE...that's just what I want to do here on out. I want to be that sinful woman in the Bible who worshipped and wept and Jesus' feet and poured perfume all over him! I want to just be in complete awe of you! And not care about what anyone else thinks! I want to be a fool for you, Lord God.

"As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humbel and gently; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the SPirit through the bond of peace. There is one body and one SPirit--just as you were called to one hope when you were called--one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all." --> Ephesians 4:1-6

To weep openly, give cheerfully, love easily, and serve willingly! Please, please help me do that. I don't want to be a faker anymore. I want to stand strong for you, and steadfast. Lord God, you are holy holy holy! Beyond words! Have mercy on me...help me see clearly. I love you and I want to see your face! In Jesus' name, Amen!"

24-7 launch!

As you may know from constant promotion for the past week, 24-7 Prayer launches tomorrow September 15th at 9:00pm ('til September 22nd) at the Baptist Ministry dorms prayer room. It is a student led, week-long streak of intensive prayer that a few of us students are praying will revolutionize the patterns of love and unity for Jesus Christ throughout the islands. We believe God has called it upon us to initiate this rally because of the need for greater intimacy with him and seeking of his kingdom.

If you are interested in signing up to attend for an hour (or more) of prayer in the prayer room during this week, please let me know...provide your full name, number, email, and the times/dates you (or a group of people) would like to cover for in prayer. No worries about not being able to fit it in your schedule, because we are going to be there LITERALLY for the entire 24 hours/7 days straight. You don't have to let me know to sign-up in advance in order to commit. We've constructed a big poster of the sign-up sheets for the entire week that'll be up so you are more than welcome to come in anyday at any time to sign-up when you can...The prayer room has been beautified with a spectrum of interactive prayer-inspirations all across the walls so that when you enter, you may be led to pray for specific things...things like prayer requests, world issues from local magazine articles, world and nation maps, campus controversy, and thanksgiving. Don't feel as if we're limiting you, for we know well that in all things the Holy Spirit shall be your driving force :) If you can't make it to the actual prayer room at all during 24-7, please just keep praying on what God's doing on college campuses and in the world.

Please let me know, in addition to all this, if you have any questions.

But man, I also gotta tell you guys how awesome it's been preparing for 24-7 Prayer and how much God's taught me in the process. You see, as college students sometimes we become really preoccupied at the advancement of our own lives. We become worried about how we're going to pass all of our classes to get the credits we need, we become stressed on the indecisiveness of our career choices, we ponder and almost idolize the issue of our future relationships, and all the while, struggle to keep a strong sense of personal and spiritual identity in the face of peers who oppose us. Am I right, or am I right?! Well, here's what God's taught me....it's not all about you! I am certainly one to vie for that one! I've totally let myself become blinded all this time by the fragility of my well-being! "Am I solid in MY personal foundation with God? Have I prayed for healing and strength to get ME through today? Do I need to be foretold anything about MY future so that I may be PERSONALLY CONTENT and live peacefully?" What happened to "Who can I pray for? What can I pray for? How can I ask God to use me in service to resolve the things about my surroundings?" How in the world did we become so selfish?! Don't get me wrong, personal intimacy with God is definitely important before seeking out greater needs,...but have we forgotten at all about everyone else? Acts 4:32 says, "All the believers were on in heart and mind. No one claimed that any of his possessions was his own, but they shared everything they had." Believers should care about each other in this such way! It was our ultimate purpose, after all to love God, and love others just the same. But the phrase, seemingly, has become cliche'd! We say it over and over and over and over again, totally distorting it's meaning and passing it over as if "no problem! that one's easy!"...but really think about those words. Do you love that lady waiting to cut in front of you at the bus stop just as much as you love your mom, or brother, or sister, or dad? Can you honestly, truly say that your heart breaks for that hobo digging out of the garbage can swearing under his breath as if his pain is yours? God's does. His heart breaks when we're hurting! And he wants us to mimic that same hurt for others as we feel for the people in 'our circle'.

Dear God, create in me your purpose. Create in me a genuine heart that is selfless and kind and loving and conformed to the image of Jesus Christ. May I always ALWAYS desire to be like Jesus Christ! Help me to forgive and never regret, Lord God, that my life may not be lived out in bitterness and worry, but in tenderness and care. God, I pray that you would stir in the hearts of college students across the globe! May they be torn from boundaries and be strengthened to step out into the unfamiliar and uncomfortable. Help them to reconnect with your unique ways, and run the race! And lastly, God, thank you for Sara and Chris. For partnering me with them in sharing the vision for 24-7 Prayer. Lord God, I can't even express how thankful I am for them! I don't know if they even realize, but they can certainly count on making a difference in at least one person's life...and that is mine. I'm fired up, Lord God! We feed off of each other spiritually like frigging pirahnas! Trading sermon podcasts, sharing scripture, suggesting books to read, refering youtube links of revolutionary spiritual leaders...the feasting never ends! God, and I never want it to! I praise you so much for blessing me with friends like these! How can I ever show you the extent to my thanskgiving?! Words are too limiting to explain how much you've worked in them to increase my faith! God I pray that this fire stays burning in all of us! Help us to build each other up in faith as well as work to massage the hearts of others. We love you so much! In Jesus' name, Amen!

youtube these guys :)

God calls us to not only seek his truth by his written word in the Bible but by the wisdom of our spiritual leaders--those who have been given a high calling to preach of his word to the world :)



-Pastor Francis Chan, Cornerstone Church



-Pastor Paul Washer



-Pastor Mark Driscoll, Mars Hill Church



- Pastor John Piper

" He must hold firmly to the trustworthy message as it has been taught, so that he can encourage others by sound doctrine and refute those who oppose it...Remind the people to be subject to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready to do whatever is good, to slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate, and to show true humility toward all men." --> Titus 1:9, 3:1-2

Why me?

The past two weeks, God has revealed me wonderous things. Things I can't comprehend, things I can't explain and things I can barely take in...but after much prayer and assurance by the God-given wisdom of great pastors nation-wide, I've come to the conclusion that God is mighty. The God who gracefully and mercifully fathers me, gives me--an undeserving, unworthy, dirty human being--comfort, peace and that unconditional love we ought not to ever find on this Earth if not for his son Jesus Christ. Why me? Why any of us?!

"Then he said, 'Here I am, I have come to do your will,' He sets aside the first to establish the second. And by that will, we have been made holy through the sacrifice of the body of Jesus Christ once for all."

--> Hebrews 10:9-10

That, in itself, makes me think about my dream (among others) of becoming a wife and mother someday...seeing as how God allows me to dream (and dream big) for myself. I can honestly say that in no way could I willfully choose to sacrifice any child of mine (nor loved one) to redeem the burden of sin that humanity has brought upon itself. Upon ITSELF!! Not because God told us to, but because we were lured into it by temptation. Our own greedy and self-induced behaviors driven by the "feel good"-factor led Jesus to suffer FOR US! You see, my capacity of love for the human entity doesn't exceed the love I'd have for my own--my lowly levels of thought and emotion just don't compare to God's! But he forgave us! He gave his son to cover our iniquities...to spare us lives of eternal wreck and suffering! Why?! Because he loves us...how could I ever model that same love back to him, and as he commands, onto everyone else? We say it all the time, "love God, love others", but what does it TRULY mean to do so? Think about it...God is like a father. He loves us, cares for us, and wishes us happiness and good health. And at the same time, he disciplines when we do wrong, he guides us onto right paths, and if need be, slaps us back to reality...for what is worse? A slap from God, or from the enemy? We often wonder why bad things happen to good people...but similarly, what makes us think we're good people to begin with? Despite our wrong-doing, God chooses to love us no matter what! Like a father, he never neglects us, never leaves, never fails us! In the face of trials and tribulations, I am strengthened. In his own unique way, God throws me difficult obstacles to see that in all things, I am faithful to him just as he has faith in me. And when he rains blessings, I am just as thankful! For who am I to owe such thanksgiving to anyone but my creator?

"No longer will a man teach his neighbor, or a man his brother, saying, 'Know the Lord,' because they will all know me, from the least of them to the greatest. For I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more." --> Hebrews 8:11-12

Who are we to blame him for our own suffering? Who was I to complain about the discourse of my life and the uncertainty of paths I ought to take? Who was I to exclaim fear of rejection, confrontation, and persecution in His name? Who was I to doubt the workings of his hands and faithfulness? And who was I to think that this life,...MY life, was all about me?!

"I will praise you, O Lord. Although you were angry with me, your anger has turned away and you have comforted me. Surely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid. The Lord, the Lord, is my strength and my song...With Joy you will draw water from the wells of salvation."

--> Isaiah12:1-3

I'm a speck! "A vapor in the wind"! A speck that's here on Earth for a fraction of a split-second in time, and gone the next! And yet, I've selfishly lived out the majority of my life working to fulfill my own satisfaction, my own happiness, my own well-being and not have taken any means AT ALL to thank he who saved me in the beginning. My God has given me life! He's not only gifted me with a life to live out so that I may play a role in in his great plans, but he's especially gifted me the unconditional love I cannot deny. Me? Me, God?! How am I worthy by any means to be looked upon as favorably as I look upon you? I am not. And yet, I can't even believe it sometimes how much I have been spared. His only desire for us is simply to live as our original purpose: to love, seek, and maintain a relationship with him all-the-while abstaining from self-service and want, and to trust in his provision.My God articulates great promises for my future. Promises I cannot call upon for myself, but those which will work nonetheless to fulfill the purpose he's called to come to past. And it is in me to pray cheerfully and dutifully so that I may serve in any way I can to progress the coming.

This is my first blog...a blog to serve not in vent, but to share the workings of God's presence in my life and To vocalize the truths I can no longer keep inside. May God bless you through it, and may you challenge to never settle for less...

"compare yourself to scripture. not to men who call themselves Christian
who compare themselves to men who call themselves Christian." --> Paul Washer